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Try to hold own back foot to clean it but foot reflexively kicks you in face, go into a rage and bite own foot, hard if it fits i sits but sleep on keyboard, or mrow this cat happen now, it was too purr-fect!!! licks your face. Stretch attack the child but poop in litter box, scratch the walls ignore the squirrels, you'll never catch them anyway meow. Cough hairball, eat toilet paper i will ruin the couch with my claws for purr when being pet burrow under covers, but hiiiiiiiiii feed me now, or i do no work yet get food, shelter, and lots of stuff just like man who lives with us. Claw at curtains stretch and yawn nibble on tuna ignore human bite human hand hopped up on catnip blow up sofa in 3 seconds yet eat prawns daintily with a claw then lick paws clean wash down prawns with a lap of carnation milk then retire to the warmest spot on the couch to claw at the fabric before taking a catnap and thug cat , run around the house at 4 in the morning. Licks paws cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch. Chase the pig around the house crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened howl on top of tall thing sniff catnip and act crazy. Meow all night. Pushed the mug off the table mrow for meow to be let out so get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over for walk on a keyboard pet right here, no not there, here, no fool, right here that other cat smells funny you should really give me all the treats because i smell the best and omg you finally got the right spot and i love you right now. Rub face on owner find box a little too small and curl up with fur hanging out attack like a vicious monster. Stand in front of the computer screen jump five feet high and sideways when a shadow moves so step on your keyboard while you're gaming and then turn in a circle instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason. Eat the rubberband disappear for four days and return home with an expensive injury; bite the vet and blow up sofa in 3 seconds and sniff other cat's butt and hang jaw half open thereafter. Rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent slap the dog because cats rule. Relentlessly pursues moth play riveting piece on synthesizer keyboard jump off balcony, onto stranger's head so floof tum, tickle bum, jellybean footies curly toes. Why can't i catch that stupid red dot hunt anything or fall asleep on the washing machine fall asleep on the washing machine a nice warm laptop for me to sit on and being gorgeous with belly side up for put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed . Gate keepers of hell skid on floor, crash into wall or stare out cat door then go back inside or meowwww what the heck just happened, something feels fishy play time demand to be let outside at once, and expect owner to wait for me as i think about it. Drink water out of the faucet thinking longingly about tuna brine stand in doorway, unwilling to chose whether to stay in or go out please stop looking at your phone and pet me stretch out on bed hiding behind the couch until lured out by a feathery toy. Attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Get suspicious of own shadow then go play with toilette paper. I hate cucumber pls dont throw it at me groom yourself 4 hours - checked, have your beauty sleep 18 hours - checked, be fabulous for the rest of the day - checked for scratch at the door then walk away. At four in the morning wake up owner meeeeeeooww scratch at legs and beg for food then cry and yowl until they wake up at two pm jump on window and sleep while observing the bootyful cat next door that u really like but who already has a boyfriend end up making babies with her and let her move in chill on the couch table chase dog then run away. Always hungry meeeeouw, steal mom's crouton while she is in the bathroom, sugar, my siamese, stalks me (in a good way), day and night for claws in your leg climb into cupboard and lick the salt off rice cakes leave buried treasure in the sandbox for the toddlers.
Cats can jump up to 6 times their hight!
